As I realized that my new job – creating a new porn website for a gay porn company I’m currently contracted with – also had problems, but somewhat different problems than my former fortune 100 company, it was the word ‘bottom’ that got me thinking about it.
Fortunately, I am only ‘observing’ the many problems. In other words as a porn pusher, I don’t have to deal with the ‘dicks and assholes’ and the guys attached to them, I only have to put together a website that shows them in their best light. At my last job I was entrenched in all the politics and power games. It was constant politics. I often joked about how I was going to ‘run’ for this or that job.
Anyway, I digress, back to my job in porn. So when I came back from checking my car for chalk marks I noticed that reception-man was sitting on the couch downstairs.
“The bottom is late.” he said. He seemed a little perturbed and kind of anxious as he said it.
“Well just walk out on the street then. There is sure to be one close by.” I offered.
“We have another one standing by upstairs, just in case.” he said after smiling at my incredible wit.
I wondered why they hadn’t already gone with the stand in. The one that’s late must be a ‘super bottom’ I decided. When I got upstairs I saw three guys sitting on the couch looking irritated. These must be the tops I thought. I guess they’re all ready to go and no bottom to poke. Must be frustrating as hell.
Then, of course, I thought of the other connotation of bottom.
Here I am I thought. Former ‘key-employee’ with stock options, bonus plan, 6 figure salary, and now I’m creating porn web sites. This is where my path has lead me I thought. I was then distracted by the ringing of bells. Oh, yeah, tinkerbell, I thought. His shorts are as short and tight as hot pants and his shirts are usually covering very little. And he has boots with bells on them so every time he walks, he rings. “Or every time he walks, an angel gets his wings. ” I thought and then I laughed at how funny I am.
Then the phone rang. Some excited murmurs. Yes, it was “Bottom Extraordinairre.” “Mega bottom.” “Bottom of the Mark!” He called to say he was just coming out of the tunnel and would be arriving in 2 minutes.
Hooray, another problem resolved and life is good again! The porn shoot would happen after all and with the star of the show….”Bottom Man”.
I kind of felt sorry for the ‘second string bottom’ though. It seemed the only thing he’d be sitting on was the bench. Well maybe after he gets more practice he’ll be a starter, leading the life of glamour that only the leading role bottoms realize.
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