Who says that Walmart doesn’t care about their employees? BerkeleyPC has just learned that Walmart purchases life insurance for its employees. From the highest level manager to the janitor, life insurance is purchased for you when you go to work there.
I know what you’re thinking, what’s the catch right? Such cynicism….. Have you ever thought that maybe they aren’t as evil as people say they are?
Well then certainly they must require employees to pay at least half of the premium? Nope, not one red cent! And, they don’t even require you to sign up for it. Just by becoming a Walmart employee you are immediately enrolled.
Sound too good to be true? Ok, there is one little, tiny snag with the whole thing. Walmart gets to pick the beneficiary. Yep, they decide who gets the reward when you mysteriously kick the bucket. So while they could put it in the name of say… your next of kin… that appears to not really be happening. In fact as far as BerkeleyPC can determine, Walmart is the beneficiary on 100% of the life insurance policies they purchase.
Now if you currently work at Walmart and you receive a bad review and/or a reprimand along with the threat that you need to clean up your act or face termination, you might want to respond by asking: “What do you mean by that?”
But if you’re looking for suggestions we recommend that you change your identity and sneak off to another country. I mean do you really think they would tell you that they were planning on collecting on your policy? Probably not!
As I read about the plight of young Miles Levin, the dying blogger, I was heartened to know that someday, when I come down with cancer, my blog too will be read. Oh don’t worry, Anonymous, I know you’re still out there somewhere. I haven’t heard from you lately though.
And I’m sure nobody bought Da Vinci’s paintings until he was dead, so I guess my prose will probably suffer the same fate. I’ll be famous when I’m dead. Not that I really want to be famous, mind you, it would just be nice if I could get more than 1 response to my 2 surveys. To quote myself from an earlier post:
For the love of… Its happening again. I don’t know why I even try sometimes. There are now 5 days left on my poll and there have been 0 percent responses. Now maybe 0 percent is 100 percent of my readership, but, considering this is an international blog, I doubt that very much.
So look to your left if you can’t seem to find it. It’s in the upper left. Make your selection and we’ll get started improving this for the international audience.
I know there are probably some of you international readers that don’t read English so you aren’t sure what to choose. My suggestion then is to print out the page and go to a translator and ask what the choices are. But do not, under any circumstances let them sway your vote. This has to come from your heart, not theirs. Think about it. They are interpreters, so they will want to have the other language be one they already know so this blog can drive more business to them. Don’t be fooled.
Oh, but of course if you can’t read the poll, then you can’t understand what I’m typing here. Well, that’s ok. Just print this part out also then and take both pages on your trip.
Product Development has developed a new line of Cat Toys. They’re exactly the same as the other cat toys only these are white. They look great! They even have a warning label printed on them directed towards human children.
So we have plenty now so don’t worry about us running out. At least for a few weeks that is.
We’re also working on a couple of package deals. We’re looking at giving discounts when you order the Cat Toy along with our other new product, the Cat Toy Removal Kit.
Here’s the images for your visual aids. If you click them they’ll get bigger.
Sorry the white cat toys are so new we haven’t had time to get a photographer in to take the pictures. We will be posting the images once we have them. For now, just imagine the black one being all white with a warning label printed on it. That should give you the mental picture.
When you place your order just let us know what color you want. If you are also ordering the Cat Toy Removal kit, please be sure to specify what size your baby is. That part is very important.
And, there are still 2 days to take the survey. Don’t delay. It can only help you.
Hello. I’m off my hunger strike and I’ve washed my hands of the survey. I guess if person doesn’t want to take the survey I’ll just have to go back to writing for myself and my cats. It’s frustrating though. I was offering a great service for a simple mouse click or 2.
Anyway, I’ve been thinking about the leadup to my being downsized from a major fortune 100 company. So I went back to read the types of things I was writing then and decided I should post some of them so you can read about the glory days. Read the rest of this entry »
I don’t know how many people caught this but its very important. I know, you’re afraid to take vitamin C because it might be from China. Or eat that Monkfish because China has been trying to trick us with its poisonous cousin the Putterfish.
And then of course we have to be sure our pet food isn’t made in China. Unless we’re tired of our pets and want to find a way to get rid of them without having to feel responsible and experience the shaming comments from our friends who love cats. If we just try several different brands (Purina) without bothering to read the fine print, we’re bound to experience the ‘disastrous’ consequences of kitty deaths. And then for our suffering, we would be awarded a check from the manufacturer (Purina) to purchase some more cats.
Anyway, the reason I’m writing is to say that we don’t have to worry about any of that anymore. Due to the bad press China has received for all of the poison they’ve been sending us disguised as food, China has excecuted ‘the former head of its food and drug industry for taking bribes to speed drug approvals.’
So let’s get out there and buy some Monkfish. Hooray!
China has excecuted ‘the former head of its food and drug industry for taking bribes to speed drug approvals.’